Strive for Uniqueness | YWAM DTS WK 5 Points

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INTRO

Today I woke up and instantly felt not good and called in. I felt like I was drugged, or had a slight hangover, felt dizzy, brain-fogged, and out of it. Since August 2nd I have been feeling really good so I just chalked it up to maybe not eating enough based on the amount of jogging I did. It was that or spiritual warfare against me. WinReflection is reaching many foreign countries worldwide monthly, some in the 10/40 Window.

The 10/40 Window is home to some of the largest unreached people groups in the world.

Additionally analytics data only accounts for maybe 80% of traffic that I can see so my area of reach and numbers may be higher. The reason I bring it up is because some people may get mad at my content and attack me spiritually so I should expect some down days here and there.

A SHIFT

What preceded August 2nd was an indirect reaching out and some prayers. My heart had been feeling bouts of heaviness and my stomach had been feeling in a knot for many weeks and because of the shift of peace on August 2nd it was confirmation that those symptoms were spiritual. It’s so weird to have your feelings dialed to 10 then back down to 1, and fluctuate in-between for no reason, as if there was an invisible dial on my chest and a child messing around with it.

While I feel amazing and was happy now, I wondered what exactly had occurred and the only thing that makes sense is the indirect reaching out to someone. If true, it means I did the right thing. The dial being turned up prompted me to respond in some way. However, there was a revelation, see my feelings being dialed up to 10 randomly felt more like a form of communication. I have been hearing many repetitive words in my spirit but was not believing it. So I think the Lord had to show me in another way and once I responded He lifted what I will call training.

I believe my response brought a needed peace to someone which also put me at peace. However, if it’s true those feelings were not my own but a revelation of someone else’s feelings then I am very deeply loved by someone beyond what I understand.

A SECRET

So if true, the Lord showed me a new trick in how He can communicate certain truths to us. However, this truth and what I see in the physical world aren’t matching up at all. This leaves me to believe that a special someone in-mind regarding all this is holding onto something. There is something that needs to be revealed or confessed and I am not quite sure what it is. I am very concerned about this because all of this is pointing so someone having very strong feelings but unable to reveal it for some unknown reason.

If I were to take some wild guesses:

• I think it’s possible this special someone who is a girl may struggle with her sexuality in some way. For example, she is attracted to men but possibly women too but has not revealed it.
• Something traumatic happened to her in the past. I felt I got confirmation from the Lord that this girl still has her purity, so not sure what the traumatic event could’ve been if true.
• Afraid of being judged for something of her past that she fears I may not like if I find out.
• Optics reasons, co-workers, family, friends may not be in support of my beliefs, she could be judged for it.

So obviously speculation but this is where my mind is calculating possibilities now. Honestly, point one doesn’t bother me much, it definitely would be something unexpected. It’s possible she no longer has her purity and may have lost it to someone who was forceful and this caused trauma. Either way, I feel there is something going on that I am unaware of and that’s the problem.

CHURCH WEIRDNESS

Also, in other things, I’ve noticed at my Church that I get looks from nearly everyone on the worship team. It feels like I am being monitored or watched and I don’t feel welcome. A term for this is monitoring spirits. For example, one person shows up at the very top of my suggested friends on Facebook and this last Sunday was sitting like 2 rows in front of me and at the end I caught him like staring at me. So, very creepy stuff going on. I catch other people on the worship team looking at me as well, like they are all in on a secret or rumor about me, kind of like a cult in a way, no offense.

Additionally, I’ve had several dreams about a couple people on the worship team targeting or attacking me and my family, and many of them are unfriendly or stoic to me in-person, even some Pastors and elders. So I guess they won’t mind if I share why I think that is.

So recently the Church bought a video wall for the worship center which was not cheap. First I heard that they spent 100K on it, then I hear it was actually 70K, and 30K went to other equipment. However, some weeks later, I was talking to someone who deals with the numbers there and they said it was public knowledge but that the Church actually spent 180K!

So I did end up sending an email to the Church because I felt a deep-sadness over that which lasted an hour! Here’s the thing though, this was the first time in my life, that I sent an email and felt like I didn’t send it afterwards. I believe the Lord’s words were in that email and I rebuked the leadership asking when the Church was going to purchase a limousine as a sarcastic joke to the ridiculous purchase of that video wall.

Additionally on Facebook over the years, I was critical with the Church for shutting down during C-19, and also about 501(c)(3) status. I also posted a lot of Pro-Trump stuff. So as you can imagine, I probably made some people mad, but I have evidence to back it all up and I mean the stuff I talk about is common sense! Just because it’s business as usual for them doesn’t mean it’s righteous business for us.

STRIVE FOR UNIQUENESS

YWAM DTS POINTS

The DTS is a six month program blending classroom learning, small group activities, personal reflection, practical service, and community living.

Most often, the training comes in two parts: lecture phase and outreach phase.

Week: 5
Day: Monday
Speaker: Rich T
Topic: Relationships

• The Church has a 2000 year-old bad habit of not making relationships top priority.
• In pride, we’re stealing from God, taking His glory. We need to have an honest estimation of ourselves.
• The Church is known to be the only group of people that shoot their own/wounded.
• Idolatry is not only having a superiority mindset but also an inferiority mindset as well, self-pity.
• We need to focus our love on God and also have love for ourselves and others. Picture a triangle over a heart, God at the top point, Me on the left point, Others on the right point.

Week: 5
Day: Tuesday
Speaker: Rich T
Topic: Relationships

• There is a lot of divide within the Church, A LOT!
• The cross + anything else = legalism. Grace is the unmerited favor of God. God gives us grace and opposes the proud.
• Humility is not a shaky voice, letting your sins be known publicly, but is dependency on God.
• Speaking the truth in love. Don’t correct others when under a non-loving spirit.
• Giving up our rights, if we give them up as a right, God can give them back as a privilege.

Week: 5
Day: Wednesday
Speaker: Rich T
Topic: Relationships

• Relationships have the biggest emotional impact in our lives, that’s why we talk about them so much.
• Origin and purpose together are what give things their value.
• Look at the proof. We don’t know how to do this, divorce, adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lust, and broken hearts.
• We need to humble ourselves before God, and admit that we don’t know how to do this.
• In the beginning, God thought up and created two sexes, something the world tries to argue against.

Week: 5
Day: Thursday
Speaker: Rich T
Topic: Relationships

• It’s not good for a man to be alone, God made man a suitable partner.
• The women’s body is not the cause of lust.
• Nothing that I am physically or emotionally causes me to violate God’s truth.
• Temptation is not sin. Jesus was tempted.
• My area of temptation does not define my identity.

Week: 5
Day: Friday
Speaker: Rich T
Topic: Relationships

• There is a lack of commitment. Men need respect and women need love. Need to respect whether you feel it or not.
• The dating culture has produced the divorce culture, get your motives right.
• Determining not to marry out of a sense of need, only God can meet the needs.
• Forgive the people that have failed you.
• Accept forgiveness and cleansing, forgive yourself and resist guilt.

CONCLUSION

Well that’s it for tonight, it’s 2AM right now but I really wanted to get this done. Anyway, strive to be unique in yourself and your God-given mission, and when doing so be sure NOT to spend 180K on a screen when you could probably feed the entire homeless population in your small town for many months. Also, the mailbox for my Contact Form was corrupted so I haven’t been getting my messages there for about the last 9 months, so if you sent me something I didn’t get it but it’s fixed now. Here is the music for this entry.